When You Lose Your Go-To Person

Who is the person you immediately text, call, or email when problems happen? When questions arise. When concerns mount. When counsel is needed. That’s your go-to person. We might have several. But none of us can have that many. Only a select few attain the prestigious “go-to” level and receive our full trust and confidence.

Ever lose that priceless person? Just a wee bit challenging isn’t it?! Depending on how you lost them can make the situation feel even more unbearable. Did they move away? Did they betray you? Did you have an unresolved misunderstanding? Did they flat out deceive you? Did they pass away? However the goodbye happened, losing our go-to person creates an acute awareness of flying solo when hardships hit us.

So what do we do when our go-to person is no longer someone we can go-to? Feels like I’ve been in a 501 level class on the subject for way longer than desired and currently taking the semester exam as I type this out. Know what I have discovered? When everyone walks out of our life, One go-to person will never ever walk out and He is more than able to carry us through any situation. Any.

Here are three anchors to steady the soul in the face of this loss that have helped me:

First Anchor: Psalm 32:8, “I will instruct you and teach you in the way which you should go; I will counsel you with My eye upon you.”

This is the verse that I’m clinging to in my current valley and that is playing on repeat in my mind giving me immense hope. Though I have lost people, I am promised by the Creator of those same go-to people that He Himself will counsel me. I’m constantly reminding the Lord of what He promised and asking Him to fulfill His promise. He has. Again and again with impeccable precision. He has used His word, but interestingly He has crossed my path with various other qualified people who have unexpectedly stood in the gap at precisely the right moment. I thought no one but my former go-to people were adequate to deal with this particular valley. God is showing me on repeat that He is not limited when I lose someone. He has others in place to come to my aid. The question is will I have faith in His promise.

Second Anchor: Jeremiah 17:5-6, “Thus says the LORD, ‘Cursed is the man who trusts in mankind and makes flesh his strength, and whose heart turns away from the LORD. For he will be like a bush in the desert and will not see when prosperity comes, but will live in stony wastes in the wilderness, a land of salt without inhabitant.'”

Yes, we love our go-to people, but they are not God. Never have been. Never will be. We can live without them. We must learn to live without them. Otherwise we are revealing that we are trusting in them rather than God. Do we really want to make that cursed choice?

Third Anchor: Jeremiah 17:7-8, “‘Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD and whose trust is the LORD. For he will be like a tree planted by the water, that extends its roots by a stream and will not fear when the heat comes; but its leaves will be green, and it will not be anxious in a year of drought nor cease to yield fruit.'”

Right after we are warned not to trust in mankind, we are pointed in the correct direction. Trust in the LORD. Today. Tomorrow. Forever. Then “when the heat comes” and there is “a year of drought,” we will be just fine.

Losing our go-to people is a test of faith for the Christian. Sight tells us no one has our back. Faith declares at least One person does. Always.

Psalm 56:9, “This I know, that God is for me.”

Don’t give up. You are never flying solo.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s